The days are long but the years are short- the most significant parenting quote i've ever read. I vividly remember thinking "I can't wait for Iris to start nursery, only a few more years to go". Being at home with young babies and toddlers is immensely hard work. To me it felt like my entire existence was being swallowed by a teeny tiny, snack monster. Constantly on demand, constantly needing to be aware and constantly being 'switched on'. It all felt so constant. So unending. Now nursery isn't a few years away,
it's now and I'm not ready. It isn't because Iris isn't ready, she's been ready for months, she's been craving the structure and mental stimulation that only a learning environment can give and it certainly isn't because I'm not ready for the break- I am chomping at the bit to get some time back to re-discover myself and give myself the opportunity to work, exercise and be creative again. The reason I'm not ready for Iris to start nursery is because I'm not ready to deal with what 'school' means to me. I'm not emotionally ready to send her into the system that destroyed me.